But last night my brain flipped a switch and i am now laying around again feeling sad for myself, i have to go to the doctors soon cause i just cant control my mood on my own so people like me have to rely on pills but i have to wait for my mum to come back because last time i went on my own they didn't understand me and didn't help at all. I don't know if you know but i have PCOS and it basically plays hell on my period meaning i don't get them very often and because of fluctuating hormones my mood is up and down so if i get on the pill or something like that it could help me. There is also a chance i wont be able to have children which thinking about it kills me inside.
But the reason why i need to get that sorted now is because i have been offered a job at a shop when there is a position available. And i have only been able to work for two months then i have some sort of mental breakdown and quit my job because i don't think i can handle it. But i don't want to quit this one, so i have to do everything i can before it all happens again. The only time that i want to quit is when i make it my career on YouTube and blogging, then i will quit properly.
These are the things i keep telling myself for when i get a job
- I can buy outfits for OOTD
- I can buy the latest makeup and do reviews
- Movie reviews
- Buy a new camera
- Interesting daily vlogs